AnHeC (I'm too fucking busy and vice versa)

Word count: about 65 500 (because page number is not really a good gauge of length)

Ok, so in fact it’s more like 4,5 ^^

First of all the title and the cover are OK. I just can't read them if they are called 'unleashed desire' or 'passionate nights' or something silly. You know what I mean. Makes me squirm and giggle (and not in a good way).

I know I wasn’t going to read for a while. I know, but people were raving about that book and I just wanted to check it out and… Read the whole damn thing! In one go! That alone speaks volumes.

Generally I like my stories with more of a… well… story. If I want sex, I can go out ‘and get some’, but a hot lovable guy or a world saving gig – not so much. Still even though it was full of sex (a good sex mind you) it somehow managed to pull an interesting premise, development of a relationship, characters you care about, plot twists, resolution… It was a very satisfying read.

And finally BDSM is presented as a CONSENTUAL thing both parties involved enjoy. Dominant was a dominant, NOT an abuser. A big plus for me, so many authors try to pull it off and it turns into a major clausterfuck. Actually now that I think of it, that book illustrates the difference between the abusive asshole and a dom. Also we are presented with the thought, that maybe, just maybe, different people like different things, not all people involved into BDSM are the same *gasp*. What a nugget of wisdom. Seems obvious, but by reading current books you wouldn't tell.

Oh, and sex was well thought out! Not just in a hotness department, but also things like hygiene or safety were taken into consideration (ex. Latex gloves involved in anal sex scene, isn’t that a bright idea! I mean, if you’re going to put your fingers ‘up there’ (like Anastasia Steele would say *shivers-not-in-a-good-way*) and then touch a vagina it’s good NOT to transfer bacteria. Ask your gynaecologist. Or just search the Internet. A glove - so much cleaner, just take it off and voile! A clan hand! Just saying. ). Now things like that matter to me, because sheer stupidity or ludicrousness of a situation without fail take me right out of the story. Call me petty, but fuck you, I happen to like when things at least attempt to make sense (yeah, who cares about historical accuracy; shoelaces in medieval world are not such a big deal… Indeed, now come and meet me, cause I think if you’ve stopped breathing it wouldn’t be a big deal either, let me put that to a test. Or forks! For the last time, forks were not commonly used in Western Europe until the 16th century! Stuart times people! And an average penis size? Yeah, check it, and stop acting like such an inept penguin *Argh*) .

After a 5 hour exam I think I deserved a little something! And as far as taking your mind off of things goes, that was as good as it gets without involvement of thousands of pages of carefully constructed world and an epic story.

• BONUS fork's history: 4th century BC – Byzantium and Rome; earlier in Greece; By the 10th century Middle East and Turkey; By the 11th century Italy; It was not until the 18th century that the fork became commonly used in Great Britain; The curved fork that is used in most parts of the world today, was developed in Germany in the mid 18th century. The standard four-tine design became current in the early 19th century.

Bam! You're welcome. See, my reviews can also be informative. Next week, let me include a story of a rye poisoning known also as 'girl be tripping - she must be a witch yo!'. The alkaloids produced by the Claviceps purpurea fungus which infects rye can have such fun effects!

SIDENOTE: One thing that will probably never allow me to give a book like that ***** - I'm not a 'submissive' kind of girl, I'm 'do-the-exact-opposite-of-what-you-tell-me-to-even-if-I-had-a-different-plan-before-you-have-spoken' kind of girl. So I have to remind myself that it's ok, because the girl wants to be treated like that. In fact she's more than ok with it, so I shouldn't get too angry (mind you, I'm speaking about a 'submission' aspect, which is the way two people interact, not the so called 'kinkiness', which is more than ok with me; totally not a prude ). The moment you tell me I can't speak without permission I'll remove your balls and turn them into a funny key chain. There. I've said it. It's not really a problem, I accept other people's preferences, they're not something outrageous to be fixed, just not my thing (kind of like eating see food or going clubbing - unless by 'clubbing' you mean 'hitting people with a club' otherwise no, I don't want to go). The point is, there are things that make you see red by simply being morally wrong (like romanticizing rape) and ones that are just not to your personal liking, but logically you're fine with them (Justin Bieber).